Anonymity rule

Lecture



One of the results of applying the rule of anonymity is that there is rarely a second call from the same person. Everything — or maybe nothing — happens between the caller and the consultant in a single period of time.
This particular aspect of listening to some is disturbing. Why try to get in touch with someone you probably never hear again after the conversation ends?
Is it advisable, even desirable, that a connection could be established not only without acquaintance with a person, but also without any “meeting again”?
In fact, many human difficulties arise not so much from a lack of contact, but from the complete inability to break some ties. Knowing how to make contact is, of course, necessary, but it is also important to allow separation from others, no matter how strong or weak the connections are.
Many misfortunes stem from the fact that people want to continue forever and without change their relationships with others, while the nature of such relationships is that they must change and develop together with people who have a relation to them. Although some connections are stable and stand the test of time, not all warm and close relationships are meant to be maintained. Failure to understand this means that such people sometimes try to maintain connections at any cost, which may be fragile in nature. The result is constant frustration and an endless search for old connections that are never deemed terminated.
In this regard, the rule of anonymity provides a special opportunity to acquire or improve the experience of establishing a satisfactory connection with another person instantly, without worrying about whether or not there will be something tomorrow. The kind of disinterested communication, which is urgent simply because of the hidden desire to report what is happening at a given time, without trying to establish any stable connection.
Therefore, to insist that the consultants do not identify themselves and do not schedule any meetings by telephone: “I will be here at this time next week if you want to call again,” means trying to be as “accessible” to all callers as possible. If callers are free to call at will, the consultant should recognize this and also convince callers to take into account the need to put an end to the exchange. Otherwise, the consultant and his organization will become surrogates for the caller’s reality instead of serving only as a postal station. It excites nostalgia and, more importantly, does not allow to inspire the caller to take seriously life, no matter how harsh it sometimes is.
created: 2015-12-24
updated: 2021-03-13
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Psychological counseling

Terms: Psychological counseling